Isis ([info]isiscolo) wrote in [info]hpsquick100,
2003-11-19 11:20:00

An old line

Title: An old line
Word Count: 100
Challenge: Bellybuttons
Author's Notes: This hoary joke sprang immediately to mind upon reading the challenge. But I don't know why it took such a dark turn.

"Can I put my finger in your bellybutton?"

Hermione sighed. "Malfoy, that is such an old line."

"Huh?"

He looked honestly baffled, so she explained. "The girl says yes, and then she says, 'That's not my bellybutton!' And he says, 'That's not my finger either!' Okay?"

"If I wanted sex I'd do Pansy. So, can I? I want to show you something."

Frowning, she lifted her blouse. "This better be good."

"Oh, it is," he said as he touched her navel. "Avada Kedavra."

"See? Don't need a wand this way." Stepping over her crumpled corpse, he went to find Ginny.

  • Post a new comment

    Error

    switch
     
    Help
  • 57 comments
Previous
← Ctrl← Alt
  • 1
  • 2
Next
Ctrl →Alt →

[info]npetrenko

November 19 2003, 10:26:58 UTC 8 years ago

Nicely done.

[info]isiscolo

November 19 2003, 10:53:49 UTC 8 years ago

Thank you!

[info]slytherin_dream

November 19 2003, 10:34:38 UTC 8 years ago

That is wonderful. *snigger*

[info]isiscolo

November 19 2003, 10:54:20 UTC 8 years ago

Glad you think so. I strive to be wonderful!

[info]slytherin_dream

8 years ago

  • Loading...

[info]thisveryinstant

November 19 2003, 10:35:54 UTC 8 years ago

EEK!

The setup seemed so light and fun! I was definitely not expecting...that. Terrific ending. Just great.

[info]isiscolo

November 19 2003, 10:55:10 UTC 8 years ago

I wasn't expecting it either! But it happened in my brain and I had to write it down.

[info]darkkitten1

November 19 2003, 10:36:33 UTC 8 years ago

Aieeee! That one totally suckered me. I had no idea where it was going and then, yow. Eep. *shivers*

[info]isiscolo

November 19 2003, 10:55:47 UTC 8 years ago

Eep indeed. Thanks a lot - I'm glad it had its intended effect.

[info]laurelwood

November 19 2003, 10:38:27 UTC 8 years ago

My brain processed your "dark turn" warning, but I wasn't prepared for it to be that dark. Aieee- good one!

[info]isiscolo

November 19 2003, 10:57:38 UTC 8 years ago

Yeah, I wasn't sure how much warning I wanted to put on it - it's only a drabble, and I wanted people to be led down the primrose path and then thwapped over the head. The author's note is more to let people know that I was just as surprised as everybody else at the ending!

[info]pushdragon

November 19 2003, 10:38:44 UTC 8 years ago

Oooh! Nasty and tricksy and so not at all where I expected this was going! I like this one very much - and I always want to send congratulatory flowers when I find a writer who has remained immune to the charms of fanon!Draco. Yes, it is lovely to see him in his canon incarnation.

[info]isiscolo

November 19 2003, 10:58:08 UTC 8 years ago

Thanks so much. And he's not wearing leather trousers, either.

[info]elsajeni

8 years ago

  • Loading...

[info]herlifeisbroken

November 19 2003, 10:45:03 UTC 8 years ago

Oh my. Was so not expecting that.

Great job.

[info]isiscolo

November 19 2003, 10:58:28 UTC 8 years ago

Thanks!

[info]florahart

November 19 2003, 10:46:58 UTC 8 years ago

Oh, fer the love of mike.

Nice. Nice twist, evil!Draco looking all innocent and then, jeeze.

Beauty.

[info]isiscolo

November 19 2003, 11:00:30 UTC 8 years ago

Thanks so much! I have no idea how it got this twisted, really, I don't.

[info]contrariwise

November 19 2003, 12:55:50 UTC 8 years ago

At first, I thought, "cutesy Draco--that's the squick. Ish," but then... I had to read the "Avada Kedavra" twice it was so surprising. v. v. nice.

[info]isiscolo

November 19 2003, 19:58:59 UTC 8 years ago

Thank you! And please don't call Draco cutesy within his hearing. Or at least, not within navel-pointing range.

[info]nadai

November 19 2003, 13:41:41 UTC 8 years ago

Wow. That ending took me completely by surprise. Draco's such an evil little bastard, I can just see him doing this.

[info]isiscolo

November 19 2003, 18:45:23 UTC 8 years ago

Heh. Took me by surprise too - thanks!

[info]prillalar

November 19 2003, 13:47:50 UTC 8 years ago

Excellent!

[info]isiscolo

November 19 2003, 18:53:12 UTC 8 years ago

Thanks!

[info]_hannelore

November 19 2003, 14:00:21 UTC 8 years ago

Yikes! I like how he doesn't need a wand because he got her right there. More spooky than squicky, great job.

[info]isiscolo

November 19 2003, 18:53:38 UTC 8 years ago

Thank you! It spooked me too.

[info]thistle_chaser

November 19 2003, 15:04:40 UTC 8 years ago

Oh, wow. Odd, but even with the 'dark turn' warning, I expected him to do something silly and for this to end on a funny note... that made the real ending even better! Very nice!

[info]isiscolo

November 19 2003, 18:54:14 UTC 8 years ago

I swear, that's what I'd intended to write. But Draco had different ideas. I have no idea how this happened, but it did. Thanks!

[info]mctabby

November 19 2003, 17:22:50 UTC 8 years ago

o.O

Oh, young Master Malfoy - how positively Slytherin of you!

[info]isiscolo

November 19 2003, 18:54:55 UTC 8 years ago

Would you expect anything less? Bwa-ha-ha!

[info]semielliptical

November 19 2003, 20:17:09 UTC 8 years ago

Excellent! Perfect tone for both Draco and Hermione. And it completely surprised me (I didn't read the author's note.)

[info]isiscolo

November 20 2003, 07:52:13 UTC 8 years ago

Thank you! I think I meant the author's note more as a comment on, "hey, it surprised me too!" rather than as a warning.

[info]luminousmarble

November 19 2003, 21:00:35 UTC 8 years ago

*applause* I love bait-and-switch stories. And I can't help snickering over the mental image--what a silly way to die. Or kill someone. "Of course I used my wand, Father!"

[info]isiscolo

November 20 2003, 07:53:15 UTC 8 years ago

Thanks very much! And goodness, you're right - what a silly way to die. Try explaining *that* in the afterlife.

[info]ari_

November 20 2003, 09:07:00 UTC 8 years ago

I *love* this.

ok, only "drawback" (and only community-related) is that it's not squicky. It's just ... well, in character.

[info]isiscolo

November 20 2003, 14:43:48 UTC 8 years ago

Thanks very much!

And, I don't think the purpose of this community is such that we must have a squick with every mouthful. It's more just non-mainstream challenges and pairings. Although admittedly I have read some absolute squicks here!

[info]ari_

8 years ago

  • Loading...

[info]frankie_lee

November 20 2003, 13:47:34 UTC 8 years ago

ROTFLMAO!! That will teach young Hermione to fall for physical humor!!

Eeeee... this was dark. But funny and amazingly well done. I think I'm disturbed by the way your mind works... LOL!!

[info]isiscolo

November 22 2003, 19:18:57 UTC 8 years ago

Not half as disturbed as I am, believe me!

[info]amanuensis1

November 20 2003, 16:50:48 UTC 8 years ago

Oh god...I don't know if I'm delighted at the cleverness, horrified at the death of Hermione, or gleeful that Ginny's next.

Adored Draco's speech style. Perfect!

[info]isiscolo

November 22 2003, 19:18:26 UTC 8 years ago

You evil Ginny-hater, you.

[info]merrycontrary

November 20 2003, 23:50:41 UTC 8 years ago

I can see it now. After all of Voldemort's complex plans to take over the world, Draco succeeds with an index finger.

[info]isiscolo

November 21 2003, 06:45:46 UTC 8 years ago

Well, it worked for the Little Dutch Boy...

[info]merrycontrary

8 years ago

  • Loading...

[info]toft_froggy

November 21 2003, 09:22:45 UTC 8 years ago

Ummm... was it only me that found that hysterically funny?

*looks sheepish*

Poor Hermione. I think it was, for some reason, the image of being able to electrocute someone by sticking a finger in their bellybutton. Like Uncle Fester.

[info]isiscolo

November 22 2003, 19:19:41 UTC 8 years ago

Yay! I'm glad you found it hysterically funny, because I did. Sort of.

[info]guntar

November 21 2003, 19:52:26 UTC 8 years ago

Ohhhh, very good, and very haunting. I really, really liked this. It's absolutely chilling. The very carelessness of the action is so well described that it made me shudder. Awesome, awesome work.

[info]isiscolo

November 22 2003, 19:20:33 UTC 8 years ago

Thanks very much!

[info]waraitai

November 22 2003, 20:53:19 UTC 8 years ago

Mwahaha. Greatness.

Ashleigh

[info]isiscolo

November 23 2003, 17:22:20 UTC 8 years ago

Thank you!

[info]muffytaj

November 24 2003, 03:09:38 UTC 8 years ago

I like how he's jsut going to continue on and kill Ginny too.

For some reason I like the whole thing, it just seems very IC and amusing.

Though of course my inner shipper would love it if they had shagged, but you can't have everything ^_^

[info]isiscolo

November 24 2003, 19:32:11 UTC 8 years ago

They were going to! Really! But Draco had different ideas.

[info]muffytaj

8 years ago

  • Loading...

[info]bobrhyn

July 7 2005, 06:25:44 UTC 6 years ago

I read this ages ago, but never commented to say how much I loved it. Utterly brilliant.

[info]isiscolo

July 7 2005, 14:28:45 UTC 6 years ago

Thanks very much!
Previous
← Ctrl← Alt
  • 1
  • 2
Next
Ctrl →Alt →
Create an Account
Forgot your login or password?
Facebook Twitter More login options
English • Español • Deutsch • Русский…